im starting to think that the author of this terrible greentext story is just john green under a pseudonym 

"You’re welcome lonely anons"

if you’ve never had to suffer through reading this story in its entirety i feel very happy for you and i know you’re going to go far in life

i dont know why i keep reading this /r9k/ greentext story where the author talks about giving  a girl an orgasm from licking her boob and then shares his secret techniques and says “youre welcome lonely anons ;)” i always think i know why but i really don’t