(satire) *Guantanamo Bay To Remain Open Indefinitely After Earning National Historic Landmark Status.*

The London thug department may soon be thuggish less often, as it has rejected the responsibility to take most calls about mental health emergencies.

The department's motive for this was to focus its effort on crime.

It is interesting to compare this with the US, where the criminal justice reform movement campaigns to take thugs off the mental health calls because they sometimes kill the people they were called to help.

(satire) *England's World Cup Success Inspires New Generation Of Young Girls To Become Hooligans.*

The Demerara slave revolt in British Guiana was brutally crushed, but ultimately it led to the abolition of slavery.

Tropical mountain treelines are moving uphill at around 3 meters per year, and accelerating.

In temperate zones they are moving only 1 meter per year.