(satire) *Gymnastics Program Gives Child Self-Discipline Needed To Sustain Lifelong Eating Disorder.*

*More Fracked Gas Exports Will Worsen Climate Emergency. Send Heat Pumps Instead.*

This is basically correct, but in practice it isn't that simple. For a heat pump system to do good, it needs to be first built, then installed. I doubt that the world's capacity to build heat pumps can deliver enough by next winter to avoid shivering in Europe, and I doubt that the capacity there to install them is enough either.

No business will choose to build so much new capacity that it will satisfy the whole market in a year and put itself out of business. With public subsidy and careful planning, we could arrange to do the whole job in a few years. In parallel with that, we could insulate houses in their hundreds of millions. We should do this, but we can't do it by next winter.

(satire) *Health Insurance Plan [Covers Only] Random Hippopotamus Attacks.*

Bogus Johnson was compelled to abandon the attempt to prevent an investigation into his lies about participating in parties at work during the time when he had made such parties illegal.

Bogus Johnson said something valid, for once: he acknowledged that there is no chance of a peace deal between Ukraine and Russia just now.

The reason is that the sides are too far apart. Each side would rather fight than agree to terms that the other side might possibly accept. Putin wants to seize additional parts of Ukraine's territory, and Ukraine wants to recapture the areas that the Putin forces have already taken, starting in 2014. Each side sees a hope of winning. So they will fight.

Aside from territory, Ukraine also wants to recover the citizens who were taken to Russia and don't see a way to get out.

After one side or both sides recognize that the victory it had sought is unattainable, they may converge on an idea of peace that they could agree on.

For now, the best thing to do is to help Ukraine make Putin recognize that victory is impossible and he may as well accept a peace deal that gives him at least something.