what would my ideal gf be?? well lets see
has good taste in music, loves metal, wears graphic t’s from hot topic with vintage video games on them, big round ass, makes me bacon for every meal then sucks me off at the dinner table, loves puns, is a bit “yandere” but only in the quirky cute way, she says “hey lets watch a movie tonight : ) ” and i groan, not this shit again, im tired of movies, i want fuck, i get ready to sit through a 2 hour snorefest, but then she puts a movie in…. and its a porno, i get rock hard, all 4 and a half inches standing proud above my gigantic sack that smells kind of like a wet dog, its hard to sit down sometimes because i can accidentally sit on my balls, theyre really heavy and full, taking up a lot of space, but she loves me anyway